An Oscar Haiku

 In Blog, Wits End

I didn’t watch the Oscars, but couldn’t help but see all the news about them the next day. The Best Picture screw-up made headlines everywhere. If you missed all the brouhaha, La La Land (a movie I’ve never heard of) was announced as the winner of the Best Picture. One little problem though. It didn’t actually win.

There was some sort of mix-up with the envelopes, and the actual winner was Moonlight (a movie I’ve never heard of). The scene that followed was, as you can imagine, awkward with a capital AWK. They had to take the trophies away from the LaLaLanders and give them to the Moonlighters. There used to be a term for giving something to someone and then taking it away, but I’m not allowed to use it anymore.

The only non-copyrighted image of the award I could find.

In honor of the momentous occasion,  I was moved (as I’m certain many of you were also) to write a haiku. To be clear, I know nothing about haiku other than they make no sense, the words don’t rhyme, and they have a certain number of syllables on each line. We all know that to be considered a poem, the words must rhyme, so I’m not sure what haiku is other than seventeen syllables of stuff. Still, I’m willing to stretch my artistic muscles a bit, so brace yourselves.

I present to you, my loyal reader, “An Oscar Haiku” for your pleasure . I did have to do some editing to get the syllable count correct.


The night of the Os

A golden statue taken

Gasps, all say what the


I hope you enjoyed my non-poem. Clearly, I have a gift.

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  • Karla Akins

    Don’t watch the Oscars
    I don’t relish being told
    How to vote and think