Why Amelia Earhart Will Never Be Found

 In Blog, Satire

New technology has revealed the stunning truth why Amelia Earhart will never be found. The famed aviatrix disappeared in 1937 while on her second attempt to circle the globe. To this day, speculation has run rampant as to what happened. A new photo, released yesterday, may put all such questions to rest.

{click on the photo for a larger view}

Using an electron microscope specially configured to search old photographs, scientists at the New Mexico Institute of Questionable Uses for Technology scanned the above picture of Ms. Earhart in the cockpit of her aircraft. A clue as to her disappearance, unnoticed for nearly eighty years, sprang out the researchers.

On the dash above the instruments, barely visible to the naked eye, they identified what they believe to be the solution to the mystery.

“At first,” one scientist said, “we weren’t sure. But after looking again and Googling it, that is clearly a Samsung Note 7 on the dash. Poor woman never had a chance.”

Officials at Samsung issued a statement insisting they’d telegraphed a recall notice to Ms. Earhart, and further questions would not be answered.

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Showing 4 comments
  • Karen C. Prough

    I’m glad this has been settled. Poor woman didn’t have a chance.

    • tomthreadgill

      I’m just surprised it took so long to figure it out… geez.

  • Karla Reisch Akins

    I love Amelia Earnhardt and I was fascinated by her when I was growing up.

    • tomthreadgill

      I’ve watched a lot of specials on the search for her, and I do think her plane or some hint as to her final whereabouts will be found. Love a good mystery!

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